Sometimes, life is so full of obvious goodness and circumstantial happiness that we forget joy is a choice. It's easier to chose joy when days are full of more pleasant moments than difficult ones.
But other times, the hard things are so present, we can easily mistake blessings for burdens.
I confided in my mom yesterday morning that while I was grateful for answered prayer, I wished the answers would just be 100% pleasant. That something would just be easy. That He would just bless us.
After lunch, I drove to play therapy with hot tears streaming down my cheeks. Silently, I cried out to God for help. For a break. For a break through. The answer? A therapy session that solidified my most recent thoughts - our little guy is angry with me and would rather show affection to absolute strangers than his Momma. My heart broke anew as we drove home.
Perspective is a funny thing. A bit vague and subjective. It doesn't change circumstances, but rather the angle from which we look at and experience them. A heavenly perspective doesn't heal sickness, eliminate pain, or shield us from the reality of living in a broken, depraved, hurting world. Rather, it gives us the ability to see from an eternal view point what seems so immediate - so impeding - so all consuming.
As I sat at the kitchen table, drinking a late afternoon cup of coffee, my sweet girls came running inside with hand fulls of dandelions and brilliant smiles. "Look, Momma! We picked you beautiful flowers!" Their hearts were full of love and their faces radiated delight - wanting so much to bring me a blessing.
There was a time I would have waited for them to return to playing in the dirt and then thrown the weeds in the trash. But yesterday, their enthusiasm was contagious, and I saw what they saw - beautiful flowers. I grabbed a small vase, filled it with fresh water, and placed them in the center of the table - where all our beautiful flowers go.
It's amazing how God will use the simple things to bring gentle correction. And in that moment, Holy Spirit revealed just how much my perspective needed to be realigned.
Somewhere along the line, I confused my blessings for burdens. The blessing of staying home all day with our 6 precious kids. The blessing of teaching them at home. The blessing of having a home to maintain. The blessing of adopting and walking through trauma with a child, so that they aren't alone. The blessing of encouraging others by being honest and real. The blessing of doing hard things because they're precisely what God's asked of me right now.
I began to be weighed down by what I perceived as hard and bad and unfair. And that, indeed, is precisely what some things are. Trauma = hard. Abuse = bad. Paying for trauma caused by abuse = unfair. But God, in His tender mercy did just that for me. And for some reason, He's entrusted me to do the same.
I have the incredible, precious blessing of loving my husband, and these little people of ours, with the reckless, sacrificial, generous, unending love He loves me with.
Now begins the conscious, daily decision to chose joy. To align my perspective with His. To regard and treasure my blessings for what they are. And to have that attitude of gratitude I'm always telling our kids about!
What helps you gain a heavenly perspective? How do you chose joy? I'd love to hear your thoughts!
Here you will find the musings of a homeschooling, work from home, adoptive Momma of 7! Adventures in faith, family, adoption, and training up a tribe to follow hard after Jesus are spilled into these posts --- most often written with a cup of coffee in hand. I hope you'll stick around a while and find something - more likely SOMEONE! - that brings you hope!
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